Headed For Splitsville?!

We’re a little more than a month into the year, and I don’t know about you, but it was a LONG month! At the same time, I’m left wondering – where has the time gone! Are we really 1/12 of the way through 2020? How can that be?!

If you, like me, started off the year with big plans and serious goals – how are you doing with them? I’ve found myself doing a couple things this week that I invite you to do as well:

  1. Honestly evaluating my progress on goals set (ugh, it can be brutal)
  2. Deciding how to refine or adjust my course to actually reach those goals!

I’ll share one of my own goals with you (who knows, maybe this will help me with some accountability?!)… but first, a little back story to my 2020 mindset!

I’m not a huge fan of the “new year, new me” line of thinking; no judgement for those who find it motivates them, but I believe it’s the same me, year after year. I’m on a constant journey of growth and learning, so while I know there’s plenty of room for improvement, I don’t feel like I’m trying to completely make myself over every time a new year begins. In fact, some of my goals actually involve trying to go BACK to versions of myself that I miss.

Which brings me to a 2020 resolution I want to share with you. It might seem a little silly, and I’m (almost) embarrassed to share it, but I want to be able to do the splits this year. YEP, good old fashioned splits.? My 10 year old giggled, too, when I shared this particular goal on Dec 31, but hear me out – this has nothing to do with the idea of being a twisty, bendy teenager again. I’ve begun to really feel old in my body, which seems like a ridiculous thing to say, but it’s true! I wake up with an achey back and stiff neck more mornings than not, and my muscles feel so tight most days that in the last year I’ve been to the chiropractor for more visits than I care to count.

When I started to consider WHY my body has been feeling so tight and uncomfortable– I had to acknowledge that I’ve become so sedentary that I’ve lost a ton of the flexibility and strength that I used to have. So, I made a promise to myself that 2020 would be the year I got serious about regaining those two things, and that would mean both diet and exercise would have to be addressed.

And, if you’ve listened to our podcast episode about setting goals (Episode 5 – click here for a listen) you know both Lan and I believe in getting SPECIFIC about our goals. Too broad, and there’s room for excuses or failure. Too lofty and non-descript (i.e. I’m going to be super-fit!) and youor goals feel more like dreams than tangible milestones. We believe you need to get specific and set goals that are measurable. In my case, one of the measurable goals on my journey to being stronger and more flexible is to be able to do the splits without tearing a muscle (or 5).

SO, how am I doing? Not gonna lie – it’s not going well! I started off strong, exercising a lot (for me) the first week and a half of January. Then, life happened. *Cue the excuses* I just “couldn’t” fit in the time for myself to focus on this stuff. Or so I told myself. Sound familiar? It’s so easy to let yourself off the hook when the only one who really cares about the outcome is you. But, as we’re always preaching: self-love means actually putting forth the effort for yourself, even when it’s inconvenient.

So, what hasn’t been working? For me, it’s a couple things – I keep saying I’ll work out in the evenings after the kids are settled for the night. Alternately, I’ve been saying I need to join a class or gym to make it more fun – but in the meantime, I’ve been excusing myself from at-home stretching/exercising – and there’s just no valid reason for those excuses!

How am I planning to adjust the course? Starting tomorrow, I’m going to wake up and stretch – I’m committing to start my day off strong. This means, before I’m going to allow myself coffee, phone time, etc., I’m going to discipline myself to stretching and warming up my body. I’m also going to fit in my workouts while the kids are at school – in between phone calls and e-mails. There’s time IF I CARVE IT OUT. No more excuses that truly end up amounting to laziness. (Ugh, that’s brutal to even see in type) Later in the day, when I’m mentally drained and feeling REALLY unmotivated, I can rest a little easier knowing I’ve already done something good for myself.

Small steps, right? I’ll keep you posted on my progress. In the meantime, what are some of your goals or resolutions? How are you (really) doing with them? How are you going to adjust YOUR course, or are you already smashing goals? I’d love to support you with them – so share in the comments or e-mail me at cathy@betterwithsisters.com !

Stay strong & stay motivated –


The Myth of Instant Results

Picture a growing child…”Wow, when did you get so big?! It seems like just yesterday you were a baby!” That experience is growth in its purest, most basic form. The incremental changes that are happening every minute, every day are so hard to see! But, give a kid a year, even just a few months or weeks, and the changes can be drastic, right?

Now, think of your own journey and challenges in this way. Are you beating yourself up over goals you haven’t reached yet? Successes you haven’t realized? This is your reminder to STOP. Give yourself a little break. Because change is rarely apparent overnight.The idea of that is sure seductive, though, right? Ask anyone who’s been on a weight-loss journey, attempted a fitness challenge, or started a new business venture. There are a lot of very enticing “see results NOW”, “make $$$ in 30 days!”, “feel better than ever in less than a week” promises out there. And, we’re not questioning the appeal. It’s so easy to buy into the instant gratification mentality and start judging ourselves with unrealistic expectations.

As we can attest through personal experience, those promises rarely pan out. If you’re undertaking a new challenge or endeavor – that’s your “child”. Would you expect it to grow up overnight? Probably not. Because, you know that’s not how life works. Changes happen like a child’s growth. Real, lasting changes in your personal journey will happen over time, typically as a result of constant and continued efforts.

If you’re building your business, of course you’re celebrating the big milestones. Frustration when profits aren’t rolling in just yet is normal; but tweak your approach and move on. Use the hurdles you encounter as lessons to help you grow as opposed to evidence of failure. If anything is true, it’s that giving up is the surest way to fail.

Which is why we encourage people to take the time to celebrate the small victories. If you’re on a weight loss journey, focusing on the end goal can feel intimidating, especially if you have a large amount to lose. If you’re working on bettering your fitness habits, celebrate your personal records. Taking note of every time you make a choice to treat your body better is a victory. Each half pound loss is a step in the right direction.

Instant results are rarely (if ever!) instant, so we challenge you to do this: reframe your idea of success. Results really mean change, so start celebrating the small changes as success in your journey, instead of waiting for the END result and being disappointed in yourself and your efforts along the way. What if you could view your progress as success? Every step forward is an improvement from where you once were, and improvement (or progress) IS success!

Don’t believe us? Consider the most “successful” people you know, or know of. Are they wealthy? Well-traveled and highly-educated? Healthy? In seemingly “perfect” relationships? They likely all share something in common BEYOND their success. That common factor? Their journey is on-going!

Wealthy people typically don’t STOP making money; they always want more money. Travelers are always seeking new experiences and exploring new places. Relationships are constantly growing deeper and stronger. The educated are always eager to learn more and expand their knowledge. In essence, the bar is raised and the journey continues. In their efforts to keep growing, successful people stay focused on the daily steps needed to help them grow. They just happen to be further along on their journey than others!

Success isn’t a fixed end-point. It’s a series of goals or milestones reached over time. In reframing the way you view success, you can allow yourself the grace to stumble and learn along the way without succumbing to false and unproductive feelings of failure. You’ll also be able to see just how successful you already are – and that’s worth a lot.

With Sisterly Love,

Cathy & Lan

P.S. We’d love to hear from you; what journey are you focusing your efforts on today? Share with us in the comments below and let us celebrate your milestones with you!

Want MORE on this topic? Check out Episode 16 of the podcast; we talk about reframing success and how we apply this concept in our own lives as well!